Saturday bonus photography post

On my photography to-do list is working on backlit subjects near sunset/sunrise. This is extremely difficult in our area because there are SO MANY trees. We don't have huge open fields that have access to the skyline because TREES.

One of the advantages of being a runner is that I get to a lot of places on foot that you can't access by car. In my runs, I found a perfect spot where I could practice backlighting. Then summer arrived in April this year and it has been too hot and too humid to even consider outdoor activity at that time.

We got a short break from humidity yesterday and the evening weather was perfect, so I loaded all my boys up to take them to my secret place for practice.

BOO YAH!




More to come from this experiment.

It is so awesome to be right as a parent

Monday night at the YMCA kiddie pool (1.5-2 feet deep) -

Laura to Nate:
This water is too shallow for you to do somersaults under the water.

Nate's immediate somersault results in face plant on the bottom of the pool.




Things I love right now:

1. This taco salad from Mel at the Larson Lingo, the right dressing makes it all (I add corn and black beans).

2. Pictures of this napping baby.

3. Chocolate peanut butter bugles, an evil and delicious discovery by Julie at Joy's Hope.

A milestone I had hoped not to hit while parenting solo

First poop in a porta-potty.

Did you know the average four year old asks around 400 questions a day? I got to be in a HOT (it was 96 and humid yesterday here peoples) porta-potty listening to 800 questions about porta-potties and their contents while holding a little pooping boy so he didn't fall in.

Ironically I kept an emergency potty in the trunk of my car for A YEAR and I took it out because we never had an emergency.

I'd like to burn some of those images and questions from my brain now, please.

Happy belated 5th birthday robo-ear!

Five years ago last week, I had a bone removed from my head and replaced with a titanium piston to restore my hearing in my right ear.

I never get tired of saying that! You can read the whole story here.

So... five years. It's a big milestone. The average stapedectomy needs to be redone every ten years so I'm halfway there. My hearing is already starting to go. I go through the whole range of emotions about it: denial, anger, acceptance. In the last few weeks, Nate has been a huge jerk when I ask him to repeat himself. I finally had to break down and tell the boys that mommy sometimes can't hear, so they need to be nice and repeat themselves. Add a new emotion to that list: depression.

(Also denial about a hearing aid)

However hearing loss comes in handy. Like if I don't feel like answering someone, I just walk away like I didn't hear. Or if someone yells at me from another room, I pretend not to hear it. Of course I NEVER do this to Jon, ever (said as sarcastically as possible).

And sometimes it comes in super duper amazingly handy with twin boys, as evidenced by this video. I strongly recommend you turn down the volume for the second half.

Make photo slide shows at www.OneTrueMedia.com

Pour some sugar on me

Alex has always been a sweetheart but age 4 has ramped up his sweetness to epic levels. He has always been affectionate and loving but lately he is so lovey dovey it is almost like having a boyfriend on the side. He covers us with kisses and hugs, he showers us with declarations of love, and he is incredibly agreeable. And if Nate is having a bad day, Alex takes his good day to the limit, making things so much easier on all of us.

This emotional state extends somewhat to the negative side, as he often gets his feelings hurt. He wears his heart out there for everyone to see and sometimes he pays a price for that openness. Seeing his heartbroken face when Nate rejects his hugs makes me realize I am ill-prepared for Alex's first real heartbreak.

The sweetness and complexity of love is part of why I enjoy age 4 so much. All the love I poured out these last few years has come back to me ten times over in just the last few months.

And to further endear himself to me, in sharp contrast to Nate's disinterest in being photographed, Alex is only too happy to be my subject.

On traveling

I made the most of my Chicago trip last week. On Wednesday night I met up with Natalie from my Mondo class for some wine, cheese, and dreaming talk. On Thursday night I met up with Jon's sister, her husband, and my niece for dinner at a favorite BYOB thai place. (Oh how I miss Chicago BYOB!) I easily finished my book group book... and another book. And I got great quality face time with my co-workers.

Traveling to Chicago two weeks back to back gave me some great food for thought on what it is like for Jon when he's gone. I've always thought I got the better end of that deal and now I know some more specifics. Sleeping at home is always better than sleeping in crappy hotel air conditioning. Eating home cooked meals is always better than eating fast food in airports. And most importantly, seeing these two crazy smiling faces in person is always better than only hearing their voices on the phone.



I'm glad we got a chance to switch roles so we could each understand the positives and negatives of a traveling spouse, but I am even more glad to be at home sweet home back in our normal routine.

Lessons in photography

Learning photography by taking photographs of my own children is probably the worst way to learn. They do not sit still. They do not cooperate. Sometimes I only have a couple of shots before they are done.

The thing that drives me CRAZY is sometimes the light is perfect, I've got the right equipment, I have their cooperation and yet... *something* still isn't right. Like Nate's eye looking like Sloth from Goonies.



So then I take a gamble and fix the eye and get the boys to cooperate again and then Alex's eye looks like Sloth.



So then I take a gamble and fix the eye and the boys are done cooperating. And the picture I wanted to take - two smiling happy boys at the pool - never happens but the picture I do take is so much better than what I envisioned.

Gun play

THE DAY Alex turned four, he became obsessed with guns. Their school does not have toy guns nor do we have guns at home, so everything else became a gun. His sunglasses (fold up one side = gun), headphone plug (shaped like a gun), play ruler (shaped like a gun), even sticks that don't look like guns. You should have seen his face when I told him he could pretend this hockey stick was a gun:




I know Alex's obsession with guns stems from his obsession of good guys versus bad guys. Developmentally, it is appropriate as he figures out what is "good" and what is "bad."

Way back when I was pregnant and on bed rest, I had hella time to sit around and ponder parenting. I read THIS ARTICLE from Mothering on playing with weapons, tore it out, and kept it for future reference. To me, banning weapons for our kids makes no sense as things that are forbidden only become more exciting. I love this article because it explains ways to incorporate weapon play in a safe and educational environment.

I would love to hear your thoughts on this. Anyone else have a gun-obsessed kid? Anyone else read anything good on this topic? What do you think of the article - too crunchy or good food for thought?

Damage

While I love age 4 (and it is our easiest age yet), one of the hardest things for me to watch is the slow loss of innocence. It is hard to explain concepts like death, cruelty, stealing, and homelessness and make a 4 year old understand them. At the same time, I think they have brilliant ideas to stop things like hunger and homelessness.

A couple of weeks ago, Alex came home saying "damage." He would just randomly mutter "damage" and we mostly ignored it. Yesterday I told them our pool would be closed because of a swim meet and he said, "Damn!" Then we had a nice talk about curse words and mean words, why we don't say them, and what we can say instead.

Jon and I have closely watched our language around the boys (except that time I screamed the F-word in Nate's face) and the less I've used them, the more I've realized how little I need to use them. I think this is a big part of why the First Curse Word milestone was such a non-event. I didn't have to spend time explaining why it's okay for adults to say them but not kids. I simply explained what those words were and we moved on. However in all honesty, it was 100% cute hearing little Alex mutter "damage" like he knew what it meant.

PS. I'm flying out to Chicago tonight and I'm already missing the boys. Damage.

I know, I know, more pool pictures?!

I waver often when writing this blog. It is primarily for me and my family, but I do have an audience I do not want to bore. Today you will have to indulge me ANOTHER pool post. These pool milestones feel like walking and talking milestones. It is a privilege and a pleasure to see these milestones unfold, and I never want to forget them.

Last night the boys agreed to go off the diving board if I brought the big camera to the pool, so I captured some of the deep end craziness. Our pool has two diving boards - a regular diving board and a 1 meter board (3 foot). Can you believe Alex?



He has only done a couple of tricks as he is still gaining confidence on the board, mostly variations of cannonballs.



Nate, on the other hand, tries to copy whatever he sees other kids doing. Sometimes it's something simple like dives. He goes so deep on these dives. I try not to be scared but he's so little!



The thing that makes it so incredibly fun to watch is that he names every single dive. He calls them "Flamingo Hop" or "Turtle Tooney." He hates repeating the same trick. We've had to spend a LOT of time explaining to him how to do a trick without getting hurt. He's gone off the board backwards, done spins, and even tried flips.



After I left to meet a friend for dinner (at delish new pizza place Bella Mia), Jon said Alex went off the 1 m board the rest of the night. I can't believe I missed it. When it comes time to plan fall sports, something tells me it might be time to stick with swimming.

2010 Summer Theme

Last year I wrote a post on how each summer has had a theme to it since the boys were born.

1st summer = Summer of Newborn Twins

2nd summer = Summer of Fishing Unsteady Toddlers Off the Bottom of the Baby Pool

3rd summer = Summer of Stopping The Boys From Jumping Off the Side of the Baby Pool and Cracking Their Heads Open

4th summer = Summer of Pooping At the Pool (the boys pooped in swim diapers at almost every visit as we tried to potty train them)

Much to our surprise, yesterday Alex said yes to going off the diving board into the deep end. He jumped over and over to me, swimming to the side on his own. When a crack of thunder closed the pool, he cried "But I was going to do a jack knife!"

It's only mid-July and we still have another two months of summer here in North Carolina but I declare the 5th summer "Summer the Boys Learned to Swim and Became Fearless in Water." Way to go Alex!

True mom confession: pool picture edition (& bonus peach ice cream recipe)

I bribed them with ice cream sandwiches to play together for my pictures.



Obviously I need to work on my underwater photography skills so I don't get other people's butts in the picture.

I made peach ice cream this week. It is the first time I ever had peach ice cream and it was AMAZING.

PEACH ICE CREAM
2 cups finely chopped peaches, peeled if you prefer (I'm lazy)
1 1/4 cups sugar
juice of 1/2 lemon
2 large eggs
2 cups heavy or whipping cream
1 cup milk

1. Combine peaches, 1/2 cup sugar, and lemon juice in a bowl. Cover and refrigerate for 2 hours, stirring every 30 minutes.
2. Remove the peaches and drain the juice into another bowl. Return peaches to fridge.
3. Whisk eggs until light and fluffy. Whisk in remaining 3/4 cup sugar until completely blended. Pour in cream and milk and whisk to blend. Add peach juice and blend.
4. Transfer to ice cream maker and freeze.
5. After ice cream stiffens (2 minutes before it is done) add peaches and continue freezing until ice cream is ready. OOPSIE! We missed the stiff point and just stirred the peaches in afterward.

PS. Another picture of Irene's boys:

Switching roles

I rarely mention here when Jon is traveling because I don't want the general public to know when I am home alone with the boys. He is usually gone at least one night a week, more often two or three. This week was a light week as he had a day trip to Baltimore and managed to get a standby flight back early enough to meet us at the pool.

One thing that irks me is when other parents have their spouse travel for a couple of days and they say, "This isn't that hard!" I agree, it's not always hard to have a spouse gone for a couple of days. You can punt unnecessary things until they get back and do the bare minimum to get by. What I have found difficult about a traveling spouse is you can not punt those things. If I punt them, then I get to spend all my free weekend time doing those things AND prepping for Jon to be gone the following week again.

Anyway this is not a rant about having a traveling spouse. We made this decision as a couple and as long as it isn't hurting our family, he'll keep the job. It's not always easy but we make it work.

This week and next week, we get to switch roles! Tonight I am flying to Chicago for a business trip, back tomorrow night. Then I'm doing it again next week. I'll get to be the one calling from airports and sleeping in hotels and missing the kids. It should be interesting to see how the other half lives. And I may have to wear something other than pajamas to work!

Pool pictures!

In the summer, we live at our neighborhood pool. It is a block away from our house and this year, the boys are finally old enough to walk there on their own. We go there 5-7 times a week, sometimes twice a day on Saturdays. The pool is such a huge part of our lives yet I haven't shown you many photos because my camera is WAY too expensive to be at the pool.

Also, my four year old boys are not known for their restraint around water.

After the first time Alex dove into the deep end, I mentioned to Joanna that everyone should get to experience seeing his crazily happy face flying right at them, arms spread. It is the definition of pure joy. And now you can see it for yourself:



Thanks to a post from Julie of Joy's Hope, I learned there are waterproof point and shoot digital cameras on the market. Let me repeat that. Waterproof digital point and shoot. Even better, Julie posted a link where you can buy them cheaply refurbished.

Sure, it's not perfect. There's a delay when you press the shutter so sometimes instead of pictures of flying kids, you get pictures like this:



But the underwater pictures? HELLA AWESOME. Particularly the second butt (Alex's) you can see in this picture.



Now you can see Alex swimming.



And this is me laying on the bottom of the pool as Nate swims over the top of me. Nate thought this was ridiculously fun.



So forgive me if I go a little crazy with the pool pictures the rest of the summer. I'm so glad I can capture in photos what our typical summer evening is like.

Charlotte trip picture overload

I don't know where to start on my thoughts about Irene having twins. While having twins has been one of the hardest things I've ever done, it has also been one of the best things I've ever done. So to have one of my best friends go through this experience... it is just one crazy ball of emotions. I could write an entire book about my feelings but instead I'll focus on the pictures.

The happy (tired) family!




Matt is also into photography so I hope this picture meets his expectations!



I know most people like pictures where everyone is looking at the camera but I will always love photos like this - sheer joy with arms full of love.



Before I get to pictures of the twin boys, I have to mention that Milo looks so grown up all of a sudden. I forget how big the leap from 2 to 3 was, and Milo has changed so much since I saw him in late December. Such a sweetie pie!



First up, Oliver. Everyone is fairly certain her boys are fraternal as they look very different. He is a quiet, peaceful baby. Cried only when he was hungry or needed a change. Content to just hang out. He reminded me so much of baby Alex.



He didn't even fuss when I put this hat on him. He let me practice taking a bazillion pictures.



And Gabriel. Oh he cracked me up. He knew exactly what he wanted and protested if he wasn't being held enough or wanted something. He reminded me so much of baby Nate.



I had to be fast with the camera because he did not want to be hanging out being a model. And pretty much whenever I propped him next to Oliver, he would cry. (I LOVE THIS PIC!)



It reminded me of my failed attempts to get my boys to cuddle for Just.One.Picture. Cuddle close = instant crying. No peacefully cuddling twin pictures but still so sweet.



I will always remember the first few months as completely kicking our butts, but in the end, having twins is awesome in so many ways. I'm glad to welcome Irene to the twin club as I can't imagine a better twin (plus one!) mom than her.

I am punting a post for the first time ever

Last week and weekend were jam packed for me. Friday I took a professional certification exam for which I have been studying for weeks (passed!). Saturday I went to an all-day photoshop class that was not good. Sucks to lose an entire summer day but I have a much clearer idea of the skills I need to work on and how to achieve them. Sunday I went to Charlotte for the day to see Irene and her newborn twins.

I want to dedicate an entire post to my visit (with SUPER CUTE pics of the family) but I am not ready yet. Instead I will just leave you with two pictures I took over the weekend. Which one do you like more? NOT THE KID! Which picture do you like more and why?

Alex




Natey bo batey




Damn I love them both. The kids and the pictures.

Lessons learned from a neighborhood festival last night

Lesson 1:
Cotton candy is an unacceptable form of food to my children.



Lesson 2:
Bouncy houses are now an acceptable form of entertainment for both boys. An acceptable, exhausting form of entertainment.

Lesson 3:
That little wine shop I've been meaning to check out sells only eco-friendly wines, including vegan wines. And they have tastings. And classes. And knowledgeable staff. Eco-friendly!

Lesson 4:
Nate and clowns - big fan.




Alex and clowns - NOT A FAN! Direct quote, "I don't like clowns. Clowns are scary."

Lesson 5:
Balloon animals are awesome.

Lesson 6:
Balloon animals pop when dropped on asphalt.

Lesson 7:
Popped balloon animals results in extremely distraught children.

How to tell Nate and Alex apart: ice cream edition

Alex:
Daddy you can have the rest of my ice cream.
I love you. Thank you for getting me ice cream.
(Hug) Sit next to me!




Nate:
I'm going to eat all my ice cream and you can't have any.
Take a picture of me. A picture of me! Not Alex! Me!
Don't touch my ice cream!

A move and two books

The move:
The boys moved to the 4s room (pre-K) this week. This is the last room they'll be in before they go to kindergarten (or as Jon and I call it FREE SCHOOL!). This transition has been so easy compared to the other room transitions. They already know the teachers and most of the kids. They came home excited about all the new toys and activities and people.

I can't believe they've been there since they were this small (first day of day care):


Book 1:

I'm currently reading Her Fearful Symmetry by Audrey Nieffenegger. After my love for Time Traveler's Wife, I was concerned this book would be terrible but it is great. I mention it here because it is about identical twin sisters, one of whom has identical twin daughters. Good writing and the twin angle make this very interesting to me.

Book 2:
I just finished Eating Animals by Jonathan Safran Foer. I wrote a post on my other blog about my boredom with his pretentious writing style and that style persists in sections of this book. He is an amazing writer though, and this was book was right up my alley. On the eve of the birth of his first child, he decided to investigate how meat is produced.

I expected to learn very little new information. Being a former vegetarian, I have read many other books on this topic. However I learned a lot of new information, specifically on pork factory farming (an issue HUGE in NC) and MRSA and swine flu. After reading this book, I can pretty much never eat factory farmed pork again. Additionally we have upgraded our subscription at Papa Spud's and will only be cooking family farmed meats at home.

I would highly recommend this book and give it 5 stars. One thing I liked about the book was it did not make the case for not eating meat. Foer talks quite a bit about how eating together is a complex emotional process. People got seriously worked up when Jon and I were vegetarians, so his words hit home for me. I don't plan to become vegetarian again but I do want to know more about where my food came from before I put it in my body and let my kids eat it.

Four boys four and under

To round out our three day weekend, Beth came to visit yesterday with her sons William (4) and Seth (2). She was driving from Charlotte to DC and our house makes a convenient kid-proofed stop along the way. We took all the boys to the pool and played in the backyard. After all the boys were in bed, we got a chance to chat by ourselves and catch up before the morning chaos.

One thing we discussed was how both of us know in every cell of our being that we are done with kids. I love being around kids but every time I am with kids younger than my boys, I have no desire to EVER go back to that age! Seth cracked me up with his 2 year old defiance... and of course it cracked me up because I am not the mom and I will never have to deal with 2 year old antics again.



William, Nate, and Alex got along so well the entire time and had a blast playing hockey in the backyard. It was TOUGH to convince them to take a picture together but they finally did it. However they were not the least bit enthusiastic about it.



But OH BOY when I told them they could pretend to shoot me, they were SUPER DUPER ENTHUSIASTIC.



The best part about visiting with Beth was there was very little pressure to say it all, since I will see her again twice in October - once for a Vegas girls' trip and once for Warrior Dash. Thanks for stopping by Beth, can't wait to see you again!

Proud to be an American

This is the first year I've felt really patriotic, as I've explained to the boys what it means to be an American as we celebrated our country's birthday.



We really got into the spirit of the holiday.



I mean we really got into the spirit except the boys wouldn't participate in the doughnut eating contest. If they weren't dressed patriotically, I would have questioned their American-ness at refusing free doughnuts.



In addition to boating and swimming and hot dog eating and parading, the boys got to see their first fireworks. Not only did they enjoy the huge fireworks in the sky (even Alex talked non-stop through the show in amazement), they got to experience the sheer joy of some North Carolina rednecks in a camouflage truck shooting off fireworks in the parking lot while tailgating before the show.

On the drive home from fireworks Nate said, "Mommy I have something very nice to tell you, do you want to hear it? Happy Independence Day!"

I can't imagine a better celebration. What did you do?

Aspirations of my four year olds

On the walk home from the pool last night, the boys asked about kindergarten and what comes after it. This led to a long conversation about 13 years of school then college. Nate asked why people go to college and I told him they go there if they want to become a doctor or a lawyer or computer workers like mom and dad. (Notice I did not mention mime school.) Both boys decided they want to be doctors.

We talked about the different kinds of doctors. Brain doctors, eye doctors, dentists, ear doctors, heart doctors, butt doctors. Alex said he wanted to be a brain doctor but when I told him that meant he had to drill into brains and sew heads back up, he decided he wants to be a pediatrician instead. Nate said he wanted to be a butt doctor but when I told him that meant he had to look at butts and poop all day, he decided he wanted to be a pediatrician as well. They were both VERY interested in giving shots to kids and making them cry.

I love four. I think this age suits me best as a parent so far. I love the inquisitiveness, the understanding, the conversations, and the light bulbs you see go on for them.

Then we talked about ear doctors and how I lost my hearing and they cut into my ear and put a metal thing in there to make me hear again. Alex pointed at my earring and said, "Is this what they put in your ear?" Stapedectomy explanation FAIL.

The first half of the best year ever

After 2009 kicked my butt, I decided to make 2010 the Best Year Ever. SO FAR SO GOOD. Here's a summary of what we've done the first six months of this year:

January:
* New camera
* Started 500 in 2010
* Phoenix half marathon
* Trip to Phoenix to visit my sister Jamie

February:
* San Diego trip, Legoland and met Jen and Erin
* Last trip to solo visit Irene before she had twins
* Second row, Ira Glass
* Snow snow snow, boys' first sledding

March:
* New camera lens, the Canon 50 mm 1.2. YUM.
* Celebrated TEN YEARS with Jon
* Raleigh half marathon, Nate and Alex's first race
* Turned 36
* Mondo Beyondo
* Joined a Unitarian Universalist fellowship

April:
* Started taking pictures of other people to learn
* Downstairs bath renovation
* Adult swim class
* Jon's dad, brother, and nephew visited

May:
* Karen visit
* Switched to all manual with my camera
* Boys turned 4, family beach trip
* Pool opened!
* My mom Jen and her husband visit
* TV detox
* First lightning bugs
* Trip to Ohio to visit entire Verhoff family

June:
* Lindsay visit
* Boys' first Star Wars viewing
* Jon's grandma Marguerite visit
* Jon's mom Roxane visit
* Solo trip to NY with Jon, including tasting menu dinner with wine pairings at Craft
* Ann visit

BUT WAIT, there's more!

Mondo gave me laser-like focus on my dreams, and helped me see some changes I need to make. It took the jumbled mess of crazy thoughts in my head and turned it into an organized list with a plan of action.

Yesterday, on the last day of the first half of the Best Year Ever, I got some work news that will significantly change our work-life balance. After next week, I am going part time! 8 whole kid-free hours every Friday to catch up on all the things in life that we move to the bottom of the priority list because Jon travels.

I told you 2010 was going to be the Best Year Ever!