3.5 has been easy on us. I've spent quite a bit of time thinking about why it feels this way. It shouldn't feel easy. They're louder than they've ever been. They are more opinionated than they've ever been. The messes, the fights, the back talking, the lack of listening - all crazier than ever.
I finally realized it is us, me and Jon, that have made it easy. When the boys turned 3, I realized this is it. This is my one shot at having kids and it is going too fast. They are growing up and growing away from me, a little more every day.
The epiphany came from my mother. My mom has always called me her baby, and as a teenager it drove me crazy (sorry mom, I'm making it up to you by writing about your grandkids every day). Why couldn't she see I was a mature woman? In the last few months, when I call the boys "my babies" they shoot back, "I am not a baby!" Now I understand that no matter how old they are, I will always think of them as I first knew them, as my sweet precious babies.
Now I start each day thinking about how I can make it a great day with the boys. Now I think about how I can say yes to their crazy ideas. Now I think about what really matters. I know some of this wisdom has come from my skin cancer experience this year. Some of this wisdom has come from maturing. But mostly this wisdom has come from the boys themselves. They give so much more to me when I am open to them as they are, as loud as insane as it may be.
From now on, I may call them my boys but secretly, they will always be my babies.
Happy 3.5.
21 comments:
Happy Half Birthday!
(Oh, crud. Your boys and I share a birthday, which makes it my half-birthday too.)
Yesterday morning, Jessica asked to hold her while I got the girls' breakfast ready, and I realized that, not long from now, I will no longer be able to pick her up and carry her around. I made a point of lifting her into her car seat this morning, and she didn't object.
Sniff, sniff. (Wiping away tears.) There have been a lot of great blog posts around the blogosphere lately about remembering what really matters, and enjoying our kids in the here and now. You make such a great point about being open to your kids as they are. And so true that they will always be our babies. Thanks for a great post!
Great post!
Managing your own expectations always seems to be the best way to handle things that you have no control over. You seem to be doing a better job at it than I am.
Being the "baby" used to drive me insane when I was a teen. Now, I embrace it. It seemed to happen around the same time I stopped getting carded.
Wonderful black and white phots. It's so hard but so rewarding to see them grow up!
I told the girls that no matter how old they were, they would always be my babies. It's probably easier to have this conversation with girls, though. They think it's cute that I call them my babies. I'm not sure boys would agree.
Happy half birthday. My daughters will always be my babies... even if I'm not allowed to call them babies when they're around!
Happy 3.5! Thank you for this post. This is exactly what I need to remember when I get frustrated and angry. As usual, great photos.
They are growing up fast, aren't they? And, even though I have a baby in the house (well, she will be 1 on Saturday), I still see Nathan as my FIRST baby. Its amazing how much they are maturing in these mid-3's...just amazing...
Seriously, you have the MOST gorgeous boys ever!
I could hug them to bits :)
happy 3.5, Nate and Alex
Oh dear! I told you I have been crying all of the time! Sniff! I seriously just sat here at my desk staring at my own hand and visualizing little fingers around it. Your boys are beautiful- no doubt about it- and your attitude is awesome as well. Happy 3.5!
You said it very well. I was going to do a 3.5 post for Michael as he has the same birthday as your boys but did an 8 month update on Katie instead. Will do post for him tomorrow.
Aww, happy 3 and a half boys! Great post. This time does go WAY too fast.
This post made me want to cry! I have a 3.5 year old as well and it does go incredibly fast...too fast! Why doesn't time slow down for us?? Why can't they stay 3 and continue to ask/make embarrassing questions/statements forever? Thanks so much for sharing and your photos are absolutely beautiful....
Great post, Laura. Happy half-birthday to the boys!
It is hard to believe they started out that small, and boring (comparatively), isn't it?
oh my word. these pictures. too much for my heart!!!
i "make" the girls let me still call them my baby. totally understand my mom now. =)
A very merry half-birthday (albeit belated) to them!
this was so sweet! i call my almost 3 yr old my "baby" too and she HATES it. anyway, these photos are seriously so so precious. happy half birthday, boys!
This is a beautiful message; I love it!
Oh my goodness, your boys are adorable! What handsome little men! Cute blog too!
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