One of the very first pregnancy symptoms I experienced was tearfulness (read about it here!). I was never a big crier before getting pregnant and I assumed this tearfulness would go away once the boys were born.
The Biggest Loser started last week and guess what? I am still a fountain of tears when I watch that show. In fact, I cry even more now. Of all the reality programming on tv, this is the one show where I feel like the show is doing something amazing for everyone. Every person on the show wins because they learn good life-long habits and they literally take years off their lives by losing weight. This show is saving people's lives.
What makes me cry is when I hear the contestants discuss they are doing this for their kids. I can't think of a better reason to get in shape and lose weight. Before becoming a parent, I always wanted a long life to LIVE as much as possible. Now I don't want to miss a single day of Nate and Alex's lives. Imagining missing out on all the great stuff that's to come for them - first day of school, first bike ride, first kiss, driving a car, graduating school, getting married, having kids - makes me cry.
That all said, I finally feel ready to start getting back into shape. Until this point, I haven't been ready and I gave myself permission to wait until I was ready. Bed rest, a twin pregnancy, and newborn twins took a lot out of me physically and emotionally. I needed time to heal and recover before I could push myself again.
I'm very proud of myself for this. Having had an eating disorder before, it would have been very easy for me to starve myself back into shape. But for me, part of being a good mother is being healthy - emotionally and physically. The work I need to do to get back into shape is going to take emotional and physical energy and I didn't have that energy bandwidth until now.
Gotta go, I'm heading out for a run before I start my work day!